Me, You & Football.

I said I wasn’t going to talk about football, like who am I? Chris Kamara?

I don’t know Jeff.

But I guess football is kinda also ‘part of my personal brand’ now too.

The other day, one of the girls and I got chatting about all things football… The life of a WAG - I joke I joke, I kid I kid.

WAG? Yes I am working and grinding… next.

It inspired me to talk about football and how life is very much the same, but very much different. A beautiful equilibrium.

Lets go.

Prior to being with my boyfriend, the only knowledge of football I actually had was when my dad used to take me to Huddersfield Town games as a kid, and I must say, I don’t think it was a choice for either of us. Dad wanted to watch Town play, and Mum wanted me out of the house. At the time I was obsessed with Town’s goalkeeper - why, you ask? I have no idea. I was 5 and a tom-boy. He was called Nico Vaesen and he gave me a signed shirt. My claim to fame.

Never did I think 24 years later i’d be sat pitch side, by choice, shouting because it clearly ‘WASN’T OFFSIDE REF’.

Wow, that was a 180.

When I met my boyfriend, his club was pretty close to home, so I still saw my family and friends regularly, nothing really changed, aside from my Saturday’s were spent at a stadium.

When we moved to South Wales, I finally understood what other football girlfriends warned me about - it can get lonely.

Our schedules don’t sync with a normal 9-to-5. He’s often travelling midweek for away games or heading off Friday and sometimes not back until the early hours of Sunday morning. Oh, and Christmas? There seems to be more games than any other time of year, and if there’s an away game on Boxing Day, he’s usually travelling on Christmas Day. You better take that turkey in a lunch box babe.

One thing my friends never understood is we can’t just book a holiday whenever we fancy. Yeah sure, players get nearly two months off in the off-season (if their team isn’t in the playoffs). But that only leaves about six weeks to squeeze in everything before pre-season kicks off.

And because you’re friends with other football families, May and June become a blur of weddings, catch-up celebrations, and holidays.

Fortunately for me, during the last two off-seasons we’ve spent together, I haven’t been working - (I’m sure you’ve gathered from my last blog posts), meaning I’ve got to enjoy the full off-season with him, but in normal circumstances, I doubt many workplaces will allow 6 weeks annual leave.

But, if his contract is up and he’s moving teams, add in finding a house and potentially a new job. Then you’re packing up the house on your own while he’s knee deep in pre-season. The joys.

The thing is, this is what comes with the life of football. Let me tell you - I’d make a pretty good PA. My organisational skills are up there. From organising house moves to meal preps, arranging dog sitters in advance, working full time, managing a household and still trying to be me…you know?

‘Oh woe is me’, I hear you scream... Calm down, Karen.

I’m not saying you don’t do this too, i’m sure you do. But it can get pretty hectic, especially if you’re doing it solo while they have to focus on football.

I think I found the first few months moving to Wales pretty tough. I was settling into a new place, while flying out to Belgium for work. I didn’t have anyone here and I hadn’t met any of the football girlfriends, so at times, it got lonely.

Like every normal couple, you have a life outside of your partner, you go for coffee with your Mum or pilates with your girls, in my boyfriend’s case he would golf in his downtime, but my downtime was kinda just…me.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m the epitome of an introverted extrovert. I love my own time and personal space, but I also like the choice. Of course my boyfriend and I would plan things together, but when he was golfing with the boys or away for a match, it was just me, myself and I, in a place I’d never been before, with nobody I knew - thank God for FaceTime!

You’ll have noticed me mention in my previous blog post, I’m at a place in my career where I’m happy to take a back seat, I want to do what I love, but it’s not the centre of my life. I think one key thing I realised when you’re living this life, is to remember who you are. It’s so easy to get caught up in their life and their schedule, that you easily forget you’re also your own person, with goals, dreams and desires. You’re not just someone’s girlfriend or wife, you’re also, someone.

For me it’s important that I make the effort to go see my family and spend time with my friends. To do things I enjoy, even if it’s on my own. To be in a career that I like, not just because it’s convenient to where we live and have my own hobbies and interests. Even if that is just going to the spa and reading a book.

One amazing thing is all the different people you meet. I’ve made friends with girls I would never have met, if it hadn’t been for football. It’s nice to be around people living a similar lifestyle to you. Having someone you can grab a coffee with, or plan dinner and drinks with, especially when the boys are away.

I think the other nice thing is making a home wherever you go. For me, I’ve never wanted to plant roots and stay in one place forever (Unless it’s in a hot country, with a beach within walking distance). So while to some, moving around every few years sounds draining, for me it’s exciting. I’m always wondering, where we’ll be next and what it will be like there.

I do think it must be tough for the football girls who have businesses tied to one place, that changes everything. Luckily for me, working in marketing means I can do it anywhere. But if you’re in a hands-on role, it’s a whole different story. Upping sticks and leaving at the drop of a hat isn’t exactly easy.

Then there’s the girls who have kids. Some will have a newborn and live miles away from their family, or have older kids that are in school and it’s not that easy to just uproot them and switch schools every few years. These are all things you have to think about, even if it’s not right now.

For me personally, my motto is - we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. Wherever we are, we’ll figure it out. That being said, I’m not going to lie, I am looking forward to seeing a tiny football shirt one day, with baby CBR on the back.

Because this life isn’t just chaos and last-minute plans. It’s finding ways to make everywhere we go feel like home. It’s meeting people who start as strangers and end up feeling like family. It’s knowing that no matter where we are, we’re building something together, one season, one city, one memory at a time.

Me, You & Football…Sometimes I cheer, sometimes I roll my eyes… and some days I’ll be packing Christmas dinner into a lunchbox. But I’ll always be on his side, even if the ref isn’t.

Until next time x